Florida Man Ditches Pants, Crashes Stolen Truck Into Pharmacy

Estimated read time 2 min read

It was a pant-free crime.

There’s a reason Florida Man is a thing of legend on the internet. Furthering that legacy is this story of a Florida Man who removed his pants, stole a Ram truck, then used that truck to crash into a pharmacy before swiping $3,000 worth of narcotics. The only thing that’s missing from the story is an alligator on a leash.

Florida man tells cops he wasn’t driving after leading them on a chase.

Surveillance footage at the Fort Myers, Florida pharmacy shows the man arrived in the stolen pickup but at first tried using hand tools to break inside. And yes, he did this all while nude from the waist down. From what we can tell, he doesn’t seem to understand the function of those tools, so some intoxication might have been involved.

That’s when he decided to ram the Ram through the pharmacy window before scooting his bare derriere inside for some “free” drugs. As reported by NBC2, police say he liberated about $3,000 in pharmaceuticals, doing around $10,000 in damage to the building to get inside.

It was the perfect plan until he got caught, all thanks to the man leaving his registered fingerprints behind at the scene of the crime and all over the truck he later dumped in an apartment complex parking lot.

To zero surprise, NBC2 did some digging and found this guy has been arrested 15 times since 2007, so that’s why police had his fingerprints on file. One would hope such a person would learn from their mistakes, but we know having dealt with criminal populations that many repeat the same cycle in their life, expecting things will magically change somehow. Also, the drugs don’t help.

So there you have it, Florida Man likes to steal trucks and burglarize pharmacies while not wearing pants because why not?

Steven Symes https://writerstevensymes.com/

Steven Symes is an accomplished automotive journalist with a passion for all things related to cars. His extensive knowledge and love for the automotive world shine through in his writing, which covers a diverse range of topics.

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